Here my brother and his colleagues train to be superheroes
and we all pretend that we don’t know anything about it. I ran by blown up
jeeps, burnt out tanks and a fake city that has seen a lot of bullets. It goes by the cheery name of Freedom
Village. Trail running at its
creepiest. I had to scale a fence
to break into the area so I may or may not have permission to see such
things. The threat of people
chasing after you with guns encourages a fast tempo. I think it will gain popularity as a new training method.
Given my recent predicaments with fire and propane, my
brother, a survivor of survival school, took pity on his big sister (Ok,
older. I am not exactly bigger
anymore). Always a student, I was
very excited to learn from an expert.
We, of course, started with fire. This is easy, he promised me, and this is what I
learned. It takes about an hour to
collect all the right materials, from the pine needles to the tiny little
sticks to the slightly bigger sticks to the large pieces of wood. Then it takes the perfect dead stump to
find the right sap. It also
requires a knife but not a good knife to dig a hole. It requires my brother’s flint and his assistance getting
the spark just right. But he is
right, with all that, it is very easy to light a fire. I then bought a Duralog and an extra
lighter.
My brother then taught me to pick a lock. This seems useless until you have spent
a day with me and discovered how much of my life I spend looking for my keys. This got much more complicated since
buying my Jeep which has “keyless” entry.
I still have not sorted this out. As every other electronic device has
gotten smaller, key fobs have only gotten larger. You need to carry around a giant key fob that fits in no
pocket discreetly but there is no actual key to open the door or start the car.
I regularly find myself driving
down the highway wondering where I left my keys and being content with the fact
that they must be somewhere in the car or I couldn’t be going anywhere. This also has me leaving the door
unlocked because locking the door would mean actually finding the key. The key remains lost and I simply come
and go. This way I truly do have a
keyless car. Unfortunately, I did
not pass the lock-picking lesson and, thus, must continue driving around with
my lost keys.
I also learned to tie knots. We discussed situations where I would use various
knots. For example, when I am
repelling out of buildings, I can use a Bachmann knot. I discovered bowlines for when I need
to ascend a tree. I learned about
an alpine butterfly in case I am climbing and my rope is breaking. I learned about a cow hitch in case I
need to tie my horse to a post. I
can do a square knot for when I have to tie two ropes together. I have never done any of these
activities but when I finally buy a length of rope, I will be well prepared.
My shinning moment came when I learned to escape from
handcuffs. I really feel like I
mastered this one. As long as my
captor hands me a bobby pin after placing the cuffs, I am a free bird. Considering my new hobby of running in
forbidden territory, I feel like this one could really come in handy.
In between lesions my sister-in-law fed me lasagna, chicken
enchiladas, better-than-crack Kahlua brownies, and Lucky Charms. I slept on a real mattress and took
some very long, very hot showers.
It was a five star stop on the trip and I even considered moving in. They welcomed me to be my niece’s new live-in
nanny but I am allergic to poopy diapers so I am rolling on to Shenandoah with
a full belly and well rested. I might have left town with the rest of the
brownies. Many thanks for their
hospitality!
You got all but two of the knots names wrong but we will work on the names of the knots next time. It was late and we had been drinking so I will let it slide. Be safe
ReplyDeleteHappy to hear that you guys are helping each other. As a father you know that I know everything but it is nice to have you take some of the load of opening new horizons for each other. Love you guys. Sounds like you had fun.
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