Road Crew

Friday, June 24, 2016

First world problems

One would think that my life is one endless Disney ride since I am fancy free on my trip but unfortunately every few days I must do chores like anyone else and this is no small challenge when on the move.  The things I used to take for granted like, laundry are far from simple.  First I have to think of every last piece of thing that must be washed because it could be days before I see another washer and besides I’m not paying $3 just to wash the one sock I forgot.  Then there is the digging for quarters underneath the seat of the car and checking every last pocket for the precious coin and still needing to go to a change machine.  Then I go to find some soviet era machines that leave me wondering if I will get my clothes back after it is done shredding them.  Finally I get to live with my clothes hanging on every hook and corner until they dry.  I’m sure my Lululemon makes my trailer trash yard sale look real upscale.
            Then there is the shopping. I can only stock the fridge for about three days so I spend a lot of time wandering up and down aisles at grocery stores wondering why, dear God, can't they just put the chocolate Milano cookies next to the ramen to save me some time? Cooking for one person has always been a challenge but can be navigated with utilization of a freezer and microwave.  It makes the two for one sales slightly more manageable.  Now instead of having the meat rot in your fridge it becomes unidentifiable dinosaur meat in your freezer that for inexplicable reasons I have less guilt about throwing out.  The microwave was necessary for the three endless days of leftovers all cooking seems to generate. Now lacking both, plus limited space, the family fun packs have not become any more amusing.  To top it off, the butcher looks on with such pity when you ask for one, yes, just one (because he always asks twice), of anything.  After eliminating an oven, a microwave and having two small burners, plus a fridge that is smaller than the one I had in my dorm, I feel like my cooking options would be no less limited as a gluten free vegan with a tofu allergy.
Let's not forget I have to catch up with the rest of the electronic world, which means digging through a lot of junk mail and deciding to ignore most of it until it becomes irrelevant.  This gives me plenty of time to catch up on pressing issues like who Trump insulted today and if we know the color of Hilary’s panties when she deleted the email.  I post the backlog of blogs to appease those living in the land of ubiquitous wifi who think it has been “forever” since I put anything up.  Finally I call my mother because I have Middle Child Syndrome and I worry she might forget me.  Obviously no self respecting, jobless, homeless Millennial risks having that happen.  After a long day in civilization, there's no place I would rather be than back in the park.

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